Single life is just as much a vocation with a divine call as any of the other vocation choices such as marriage, priesthood or religious life.   Some people may think of the single life as the "last resort" - the vocation where anyone ends up who doesn't feel called to be a priest or religious or who can't find a suitable spouse for marriage.  But God calls certain people to the single life.  The Church needs people who can dedicate themselves to their work and the spread of the Gospel out in the world.

Single people can do great work for the Church. They have the freedom to proclaim the Gospel in a variety of work.  Some singles pick certain professions which require a great amount of time and dedication, such as medicine or teaching.  They can choose to give their time to help people around them who are in need.  A single person can wholeheartedly dedicate him or herself to carrying the work of the Church in a special way.  Some single people choose to work for the church in a paid lay ministry role.

As with the married state, the single life is a vocation which is carried out in the midst of the world. The vocation of single Catholics is to represent Christ wherever they are and whatever they do, whether they are businesspeople, typists, teachers, writers, politicians, doctors, computer programmers, media experts, lawyers, musicians, government workers, truck drivers, or lay missionaries. By the silent witness of a holy life, these single people are lights shining out in the world, pointing out the way to God.

At an early age, I was taught that if you find out what God wants you to do with your life, you will find joy.  As a single person trying to carry out the message of the Gospel each and every day, I find joy in doing what God wants for me.

People have asked me ‘don’t you want to be married” or “why don’t you become a nun?”  It is important that I not let someone else define who I am and that I remember this is only their opinion.  They might not understand what a life embracing the single vocation involves. 

It is a full life.  I am not in waiting for something or someone.  As a single person I am responsible for myself in everyway.  I work in the corporate world to provide for myself and it is important that I bring my lifestyle as a Catholic Christian to that work.  I don’t have to bring a soapbox to work to shout my love for Jesus.  It is there as a part of what kind of employee I am and how I treat those around me.  

I have a passion for ministry to carry out God’s message.  I especially enjoy my volunteer work in the world of social justice.  I am a longtime member of our parish’s social action committee which promotes taking food to the soup kitchen, gathering necessities for the homeless shelter and building houses for Habitat for Humanity.  It is my heart.  I know that God asks us to remember those in need and to do what we can.

Also, I have taught in the religious education program in my parish for eleven years.  I love working with the children and these last few years, preparing them for First Communion.  My students’ parents tell me that their children think that I’m “cool” and if I’m involved with church, it must be a “cool” thing to do.  Because they see me at church and being a Eucharistic minister, they seem to grasp how important God and His church are in my life.  I realize that in this modern world, many of them might be single a good deal of their adult lives.  I realize that I might be one of the few role models for them and how they deal with that part of their lives.  I want to share with them the importance of seeing our parish as an extended community beyond their family. 

 It is important for me to spend time with those I love.  Because that isn’t built into my day as it might be with a spouse and children or a community, it is important that I take the time to be with those that support me and listen to me.  They give so much to me in making me feel loved and grounded.

Sometimes people ask me what I do in my free time.  I just ask them what free time?

I go to graduate school.  I am a good sister and friend.  I am an awesome aunt.  I do volunteer work each and every week.  I take care of my home and my yard.  I love to dig in God’s earth and plant beautiful flowers.  It is a busy life.  When people ask if I’m lonely, I try to be as honest as I can be.  I’m not lonely when I’m by myself because I can call a friend, go for a walk, read or pray.  I know that God is with me and He is great company.  But sometimes, when I’m in a crowded room, that’s when I can feel lonely.  Because that’s when I realize how many times people just exist and don’t connect.  That makes me sad.

 It is important to be true to yourself and who God called you to be.  Being single opens so many opportunities because I am graciously included in other’s celebrations.  After all, what’s one more person?  There is also the responsibility to be true to myself and not allow others to insist that I am just there, without a relationship that is reciprocal.  If the friendship is just one way, I know that it is not a true friendship so I must move on.  For those that friendships do work, there are opportunities to be close to people, to explore the social part of being human.

God has granted me so many gifts and talents and the opportunities to use these in my life.  I do feel Him as a part of my life and hope that I can share that with those around me, out in the world.  It is my hope that I can live out our baptismal call to be holy as God is holy and be an example of Him in the world.

 Being single is still to be a whole person.  Some people say that to be single is to be alone.  But God sees us as all one.  Jesus promises to never leave us and I feel His presence in my life.  It is such a gift in my life.

Carolyn Obert

Living My Catholic Vocation Today

Catholic Online

                                          Family Life Office, Diocese of Columbus

Stephanie Jenemann, Director

Susan Connolly, Program Coordinator

Nancy Uher, Secretary

197 East Gay Street Columbus, Ohio 43215

614-241-2560

E-mail: FAMILY LIFE OFFICE